Monday, October 29, 2007

Table for one, please.

So a few weeks ago, my relationship blew up in my face and suddenly I was single, after almost 14 months. To be sure, it absolutely threw me for a loop: I knew we were bickering more, but really thought it was work-out-able, and what actually ended up being the defining event is still so baffling to me on several levels. In the 2+ weeks since, which translates to approximately 900 years in Eleanor Time, I have reached the following conclusions:

1. This relationship should and would have ended anyway.
2. But, the way this relationship ended was horrible.
3. And, I did not realise that my ex was capable of such hurtfulness via his incapability to communicate.

Because this is the worst part of it. There was no break-up conversation. There was an incident, which culminated in us being in the same room together. But there was no fight and remarkably few words were exchanged. And I did walk out the door, but I never ever thought it would be the last time that we talked. I've reached out multiple times in ways that I feel are fair--it's been very important for me to handle this situation with grace and dignity--but to no avail. There has not been any instance of acknowledgement from his end, which frankly lends a surreal bent to the situation at times, like this really isn't happening. I cannot fully explain because I can't yet fully comprehend how exquisitely painful it is for someone that you have been sharing an unprecedented level of intimacy with to just drop out of your life. Vanish, like he was never there to begin with.

Shit. This post is already way longer than I had intended. And way too serious. Okay, I'll close with a moral quandary that I would appreciate your help on. Just a few days before the implosion, we ended up going in together on four football tickets for this big Thankgiving game that he really wanted to go to for his birthday. The original gift was me footing two, but he wanted to take his parents as well, who will be in town for the hol. So he gave me the cash, I got the tickets, we break up in an extraordinarily ignominious fashion shortly thereafter, he refuses all communication with me, and, well, I still have these tickets. For a game that I didn't care about to begin with and now anti-care about. A game that several friends (male, naturlik) have told me I could easily fetch twice the money for the tickets. So you see where I am going with this. High road, low road, slight detour? I'd be interested to hear your thoughts.

And anything else you might want to add. I've got the time on my hands now.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Option A) "Morale High Ground"
he paid for two - mail his tix to him; you paid for two - sell yours to the highest bidder and go buy shoes. Lots of shoes.

Option B) "Just Desserts"
Sell all four, buy yourself la perla lingerie and chalk it up to the perils of dating. He would reach a low below the lowest low ever to qualify as low to ask for those tickets back.

*either option will be within your right, but i emphasize "A" b/c it will purge from your system any obligation or strings attached.

**make sure you sell your two tix to a gaseous windbag

Anonymous said...

Option A from above. Defintiely.

Anonymous said...

God I'm so sorry that sounds like a big head scratcher indeed. Boys are stupid, but you probably knew that. But after 14 months? Stupid.

Anyhoo, I'm with the ex-files. Get rid of his two (mail with no note, as per his lead) and make a profit off the sitch. I'm also voting for shoes. Nice autumn boots maybe?

Does this mean you will blog more often?

Anonymous said...

What did you do in the end?