breakroom musings

I was just in the breakroom, popping some popcorn for a midafternoon snack. Above the mini-fridge, someone stuck a notice that says, "Remember: Did you put your food into the fridge a week ago? Is that why it is smelling now?" My first judgement was: passive-agressive muthafuckas! Just write, "Get your nasty shit out of the fridge because it be stinking it up!" But upon closer reflection, I know that there are a lot of international people working in that area, and that it is entirely possible that the notice was written on the ESL tip, what with the word choice and syntax and all. In fact, the more I think about it, it seems likely. I have my bets on this German girl I pass often in the hall. And then the passive-aggressiveness can be forgiven, for I am accepting of all types of intercultural communication techniques.

I also had time to clean out my Nalgene bottle, which had been positively stankified by water left in there since Friday. I drank like half of it and then thought, "What's that smell?" It was swampy. I thought I was going to throw up. My stomach did do topsy-turvy growlies about a hour later, but admittedly it could have been psychosomatic.

AND LASTLY. I burned the popcorn. It was weird, normally I set it for 3:33 and it still isn't even done when the time is out. So I put it on 4 mins and at 3:30 it was burning. I kind of like it that way, though, so what do I do? Open the bag and promptly place a burned ass piece in my mouth. It literally SIZZLES my saliva and begins to disintegrate at such a rapid rate that I can't get it out of my mouth quickly enough. I just leant over the trash bin and went ahthhhhh until most of it slithered out. It kind of grossed me out.

But not enough to stop me from eating the rest of the bag!