Is that a hematoma in your ear or are you just glad to see me?

So Saturday night I had a couple of friends over for a lobster boil. And by that I mean that we wanted someone else to kill the lobsters and we enjoy their yummy insides. But the fellows at the farmer's market sneered when we suggested that, so we ended up going home with three live ones slowly suffocating in a plastic bag. It was to be a rather dark evening.

I'm saving it for another post when I can put in the pics, but later on the same night, we were sitting outside drinking wine around a fire. I was petting ever-present Lu when I felt an enormous bulge. . . in her ear. It didn't seem to particularly bother her and also I was extremely full and drunk, so I was pretty calm about it. There was absolutely nothing I could do about it until the morning, and I thought I remembered that my vet was open on Sundays so I made a mental note to check online. Once I was able to stand and walk and operate a computer again.

I think it's important now to show you a visual of what we're dealing with here. I didn't take a picture of her yesterday, but I found this picture online of an aural hematoma--that's what she has. Clearly, however, this dog is white but Lu is black--well, mostly, I left her little white chin--so I had to do some doctoring up of the image.

On a related note, it is really hard to colour in images using powerpoint. I was stunned to realised there is no spray paint option--I mean jesus how effing basic is that? So I had to use a million free form shape squiggly thingies and connect them to fill them in with black. It took me about 20 minutes because I kept messing up and then getting frustrated and checking my email or ebay or something.

On a related note, I'm not very busy at work today.

Anyway, I finally got her coloured in--you will note I even made her eyes brown for an added touch of realism. Then I put a thought bubble in with what I know she is thinking about at any given time and capped it all off with an emphasis on the hematoma itself.

Voila!

Anyway, the better part of $200 later, she is on antibiotics for an ear infection and steroids for the hematoma. I keep daydreaming about coming home and catching her lifting weights in the corner of the basement.

Hematoma! Hematoma! Maybe I should make-up a song about it. Anyway, her medication schedule is extremely complex and I'm a little nervous about fucking it up. I had to write it all out on a calendar last night and put up notes on every exit door in the house that say LU MEDS.

I'm going to be a great mom!